Can I just have a moment here? I’m 38 weeks pregnant and time has gone way too fast. As elated as I am that we are having our rainbow, I’m also so, so sad to say goodbye to my bump. My belly and heart are so full and happy, and I’ve grown so attached and protective of my bump that I never want it to end! I mean, sure, I miss wine and coffee like crazy! I survived Italy without eating any deli meats and cheese (wah!) or anything amazing I thought might be a risk, but it was soooo worth it. I feel a little twinge of jealousy watching David eat and drink anything he wants, but honestly, this is so much better. Feeling my baby move inside of me is better than any bottle of wine, or any food I’m missing out on. It is fulfilling and satisfying on the highest level. I can’t even put my love and joy into words. It’s overwhelming. It is Holy and Divine. Nothing compares. Our very own little secret!
The best part is that I’m so completely in love with David that this is just an extension of what we have. This is literally a physical being created from our adoration of each other and it just makes me feel so complete to carry this piece of my husband with me. My baby is with me day and night, stirring and hiccupping and growing… I’m never alone. Like, in my body, I am never alone. I love it. I’m a needy person by nature and this is the best company I could ever hope for! When David travels for work, I no longer feel sad and lonely. Well, that’s not entirely true; whenever I start to feel sad and lonely, my baby’s movements remind me that I’m never alone.
These are the things that I’m not ready to say goodbye to. I know it will be amazing to see and hold my Piccolo (our nickname for baby, hehe) in my arms, but I’m just not ready to share. Right now, he is all mine, and I am all his. We are one! Once he is born, I will no longer be the only one to embracing him. He will be cuddled and snuggled, and fed and taken care of by many others. Our special time will be over, and all I’ll have left are memories of the first baby, the first piece of my flesh, that I carried to term. Can this please slow down? I need more time to savor, relish, and delight in every single second of every hour of every day!